Sunday, April 11
Yet another spiritual path...
I don't know what happened to me, waking up so late. I mean, this is one of my record days I slept in. I even took another nap later on. Can't seem to understand why I was so tired all day.
So you know, I missed church, and decided to listen to Pastor Prince's tapes. It had renewed my faith in Him from feeling so down this week. I don't know, I did a lot of things I wouldn't have done this week. Blood donation was one thing. Yeah, miracles did happen. I know it. It took me a lot of courage to go forward and have my skin pierced by a needle. I was extremely afraid. Afraid of blood, afraid of pain, afraid of everything it emcompasses, all those antiseptic smells, the anaesthetic jab. In truth, I was really scared. But I know God brought me through this. And I survived a miracle. Really.
So how did I actually thought about donating blood? I don't know. Wednesday morning when I arrived in school, I saw my friend eating in the canteen in preparation to go for blood donation later on. My first thought was, "no way am I gonna do it". Serious. No way. But I did actually contemplate, but I was still far from the reality of going for that. I saw my friend go through though. It's easy to see people, but you can't really imagine yourself seated in her place. Especially for me. (I'm really timid, sad to say. But rather than act tough, why not let God shield your weakness?)
Wednesday night came the revelation. Suddenly, I just thought, "I have to go". It just overcame my fear. I didn't really feel afraid. All I thought was to go for it, see yourself through this process. I didn't feel afraid at all. At all. Really. I could almost picture myself on the metallic chair, blood flowing out of my veins. God was so subtle I didn't realise He was there.
Then came the hurdle. Thursday morning, I woke up with a bad stomach. It was acting up throughout the whole journey to school. I ended up pale from diarrhoea. My friends even advised me against the blood donation. Later my stomach cleared up a little, but unless I ate, I couldn't possibly go for the blood donation. Somemore I had Commando Lee for PE, and he's a sadist. Volleyball was never ending. I was so afraid it would eat up my recess. He had us controlling the ball for 6 times, and everyone just couldn't pass that test. Darn him, and I was so frustrated, until I managed (barely), to pass, and get out of his lesson, have a quick lunch. By that time, I was so tired, plus Chem test right after that, and I hadn't really studied. Even before half day, I was totally exhausted. How on earth am I to go through that blood donation? I must be crazy.
Chem test was er, quite a flop. But that wasn't important. I was going for that donation right after it, skipping F maths lect and GP. There and then, I started getting the nerves. Then, the thought of not going for it passed my mind. Somemore, I was going without my mother's knowledge. (I faked her signature. Oops.) I had a lot of excuses not to go, but ended at the hall anyway. I must have been mad. Really. Throughout the whole day, I was feeling weak. But I pulled through anyway. Seriously, I didn't think I could do this. But He was there for me. It was a miracle.
Posted by Isabelle at 9:12 pm